I took a long break from blogging because I wasn't sure if all my triathlon speak was great for my readers. I wish that I had kept writing more. I'm still a wreck. I lost the love of my life on April 19th. We were training for Ironman Coeur D'Alene together with his best friend. His best friend and I decided on May 3rd or so to continue on with the race. Although I probably didn't really start to train again until May 19th.
My first days back were very efforted. It felt like I was dying also. I wasn't eating or sleeping. I kept having panic attacks. I had shortness of breath even going up stairs so trying to get back into running was tough. Swimming was a chore although I never admitted it to anyone. And I'm a pretty natural swimmer. But... evenutally I just kept plugging away and things eventually got better.
With the support of Pete's best friends, his big brother, his parents, and my friends and family- it got easier. It is pretty unbelievable how much love was shown. I just wish that all the love in the world could bring him back to us.
People came out in big ways. Sending packages all the way from NC. Coming out in groups to help us train on our long rides. More people than normal showing up for the runs. Providing financial support. Tons of cards and flowers. A lovely chicken noodle soup package. Candles. A friend who I hadn't seen much of took me to the spa. Baskin Robbins gift card- I happen to live right next door to one. Lots of dinners. Taking time off of school and stopping work to come and take care of me - helping me plant things in the back yard. Journals. Great self help books. Borrowed artwork. Family letting us stay in there house for the big events. Welcoming my mom into their home with lots of love. Children making me artwork. People letting me stay at their house when I was afraid to sleep at home. House help since my Mr. Fix It is gone. Work was wonderful about giving me time off. A friend's family who I had never met drove to the race to support me for the swim. Lots of advice/ mantras on how to complete the race. I simply cannot think of everything but you can see how overwhelmed it is to try and make sure that you thank everyone appropriately. I don't have everyone's addresses.
Thank you. I am eternally grateful.